What to do, what to do... sigh.

On the training front, I ran 6km last Thursday and have basically done very little since.  After my 15km on Monday followed by my big spill on Wednesday, my knee & ankle needed some rest.  So, rest I did and I basically haven't gone back out there despite intentions to run 5 short runs in a row this week.  I need to scale back on the long SRs because I'm simply over doing it.

Yes, I realize it sounds like an excuse.  I isn't.  I hope it isn't.  My body just isn't responding as well as I'd like and believe me, it pisses me off.  Why the F did I let myself get SO out of shape after the last season ended?!  Stupid.

But I'm in a bit of a pickle now...  remember when I went on and on about walking in the Weekend to End Women's Cancers?  And then when I said I had chosen the half-marathon over the walk?  Well, I don't know what to do.  My gut (and my guilt) is telling me to WALK.  What's more important?  Personal best (not that the race would be but you know what I mean) or bonding, inspiration & just good ol' giving.  A big part of me thinks that I just won't be ready in time for the run and that's really okay.  I can run another race in the spring or I can get out there and do what I can.  So maybe I'm trying to talk myself into doing the walk knowing it may really screw my body for what I've been working towards as of late?  Sigh.  I really don't know what to do.  I want to walk because I want to be a part of that movement and it is so important for me to walk because my MIL doesn't have that chance.  I never want M to go through what D did when his mom passed away.  I want to run to prove to myself that I can do it again and that I can achieve that goal.  I want M to be proud of me for committing and being active.

I have no idea what to do.

Wednesday

So I followed up last week's 12km run with a chiro appointment & lazy 4km the next night before promptly taking 4 days off.  FAIL.  I got back out on Monday evening and pushed myself to run 15km!  It was HARD.  Really hard.  So hard that when the girl on my iPod announced that I had 4km to go, I screamed 'fuck off' to no one in particular at the intersection of Leslie & Lakeshore.

I've been really feeling it in my body since that run.  My left ankle feels a bit like it's got some bone-on-bone action and my right knee aches.  I feel old & out of shape.  Anyway, it is what it is and I just need to keep training.  I've got 6 more weeks to go and in those 6 weeks, I need to add 6 more kilometres to my longest route to date.

I met up with a friend tonight and did a 5km loop.  It was so nice to run with someone but definitely challenging to keep up a conversation while running.  Just something I'm not used to but something I'd like to practice.

Tomorrow's schedule calls for 5km and I'm hoping to get out at lunch to do it.  I need to spend some solid time at home in the evening tomorrow to get a few things accomplished.

Week 3?

I think I'm into my 3rd week of training and I like to think that I'm absolutely killing it.  Yay ME!

I did my 4km on Saturday afternoon and had plans to meet my BFF to do our big 12km run on Sunday.  Plans fell through and a couple glasses of wine followed the pizza into my mouth and I didn't get out.  Monday was a big FAIL that involved ketchup chips but I'm over it and not talking about it anymore.  Tuesday?  I got out for a 12km SR and rocked it!  I felt awesome the entire way through...  well, after my first 2-3km loosening up thing and then I felt awesome.  Followed it up with a quick 4km loop tonight.

Last night was the first night where I finished my run and immediately knew that I could do it.  I will be ready to run the half-marathon on that Sunday in October.  I'm totally pumped!

Many Reasons...

But no good excuses.  I just couldn't do the 10km this morning.  My head & body weren't into it and I felt like a bag of hammers the entire time so I cut it short at 5km.  I'm really disappointed in myself that I just couldn't push through it.

We're away for the weekend but back Monday afternoon.  I'm hoping to do my long run on Monday evening to make up for this one.

Week One Done

I'm pretty sure I kicked ass in the eating & running department this week.  Yay!

Training this week was as follows:

Sunday:  7km (I decided against the 10km to avoid potential injury)
Tuesday:  4km
Wednesday:  2.5km
Thursday:  5km
Friday:  3km (Skipped today's rest day and ran Saturday's run because we're away for the weekend)
Saturday:  10km (not yet run...  obviously...  but I've got it scheduled for the early morning)

Since Sunday, I've run a grand total of 21.5km.  I'm still working hard to find my groove and it takes a good 2km before my legs feel loose enough to maintain a good pace.  I'm still slow in the pace department but I'm trying to remind myself that "slow and steady wins the race" and that the important part is that I'm out there pounding the pavement.

I've got a long way to go but like my BFF said, I am COMMITTED.  I really want this right now.